16 Apr, The George, Eartham, (10,13)
Updated: May 8, 2019
The first to arrive at the George in Eartham were Tonka and Slumpy. Keen to impress his fellow Shabis after HIS RIDE the week before, Slumpy swept into the bar,
Slumpy “Good day to you kind sir, one would like to entertain guests here this evening.”
Barman “ Well you can’t”
Slumpy “But I must impress my colleagues, they will be most angry if I cannot feed them”
Barman “Tough, we’re too busy”
Deflated at not arranging food Slumpy trudges back to the carpark and begins polishing his new shiny bike. Chuff is next to arrive,
Slumpy “Please sir, I tried to arrange food but the barman said No, please don’t flog me I tried”. Chuff uses some appropriate Anglo Saxon language to berate Slumpy and enters the bar.
Chuff “I understand you are too busy to provide sustenance to my friends.
Barman “Yes, we are busy”
Chuff “ have you recently decorated the bar?”
Chuff “Shame, it will be a pity to spoil it”
Barman “Here have some meus, we will have your food ready for your triumphant return.”
Chuff “Why you are so kind”
With Menus in hand Chuff greets the shabis in the car park, Roll call is Slumpy, Tonka, Fracker, Dobby, Smashie, Genghis, Algernon, Sir Fallalot, Big Ring and Chuff.
What follows next is an episode of Shabis are you tough enough.
In True Ant Middleton style Chuff starts to whip the shabis into order, “Hurry up and pick your meal, Slumpy stop polishing your bike! Get your arses in gear ladies”
With everyone trembling in their shorts the team are ready to go, Wait Dobby has gone AWOL, having been the receiving end of Anglo Saxon language before the mild mannered Dobby had run off to the front of the pub and was found cowering behind a bush.
Off we set a little bit of road work, turn right on to the fire track. The pace was fast and relen The George, Eartham, fantastic pub... tless,
Chuff “Keep up no F####g Slacking” “Get a move on”. A fast pace was maintained by all reaching the downhill single track in record time.
Corkey Overtakes SFAL:
Chuff “Let’s go, move it ladies, follow me” Not quite Lions being led by the Donkey, but all shabis meekly follow down the fast flowing single track with some superb jumps. On reaching the bottom the excited Shabis shout again, again so we complete 2 more runs with Algenon filming the heroic actions of all.